Happy V.D.

AND AFTER TODAY I THINK THAT HAVING VD WOULD BE MORE FUN THAN HAVING TO LIVE THROUGH ANOTHER DAY LIKE THIS!!!!! :(

I know I have been incredibly bad about keeping this updated and I don't have an excuse other than the computer @ home was all screwy but NOW it's fixed and hopefully I can be bloggin' away on a regular basis from now on.

Well, I noticed that I haven't update since January 28th. I want to tell you that A LOT has happened since then, but it hasn't. Same old stuff on a different day!

Kaylin is still in WV and I am missing her something awful. It makes me wanna cry when I think about her. I know Ralph's family is taking good care of her and that she's OK but I just miss my "Pee Wee Nator!" :( I think we've struck a deal that Ralph's Mom is bringing her home around the first part of March. That will save us a little bit of money, but after today, I don't think it will really matter.

There had been something wrong with my car for a little while now. Some knocking and pinging. Well, my co-worker, WC, told me that it was my U-joints and that when they went out, that was all she wrote. So, they got really bad this weekend, and we ended up taking the car into Galpin Ford today. They called me this afternoon and the car needs 2 new front axles, 2 new motor mounts, a new timing chain, the throttle plate is worn, the radiator leaks and there's about 6 leaks in other places he said. They quoted me a repair estimate of $2400+. (:-O I thought I was going to fall over when he said that. I mean Ralph and I have been talking about trading it in and all, but now I don't know if we are going to be able to? It's virtually worthless. We are supposed to call them tomorrow to talk about trade-in stuff. I just feel so overwhelmed with this whole car thing right now.

It just feels like we are never going to get ahead with our finances. For every step we take forward, we take 2 back. It's very frustrating and discouraging. Work, work, work and for what? To be in debt the rest of my life??? Someone once told me "You'll be in debt until the day you die." Is it so wrong of me to want to try to keep that debt as low as possible? I mean when are the fates going to smile on me!?!?!?! *sigh* :(

And then to top it off, it's Valentine's Day. I know that should mean something to me, but it doesn't really. I was forgotten this year. Again. No card, no gift, nothing. Ooo--I got MC DONALD'S for lunch >:( Give me a break. You know...holidays come on the same days every year. I always make sure that Ralph gets SOMETHING on the holidays. He doesn't ever seem to reciprocate the deal. I don't know what the problem is? I am beginning to not be happy again. I thought last time that I would just suck it up and try to work on my end of things, because I realize I am FAR from perfect. But nothing changed and he's just as lazy towards me as he ever was. Would it kill him to buy me a little gift? Or send me a FREE e-card? Or take me out when we can GO (no work, no kids, etc.) instead of sitting at home in his chair? I mean I can't even remember when our last date was...no wait--I can: December 14th, when he took me to his company Christmas party. That was a fun night. Gee. It's been TWO MONTHS...would it kill him to take me out more than 6 times a year? I hate to complain, because it never really works to tell the truth, but that's just pitiful. I feel so unappreciated sometimes. No unloved. I don't doubt he loves me--but it wouldn't hurt to be reminded every now and again. I am going to quit doing things for people on the holidays. I always say that I am but I never do. Today, I made chocolate goodie bags for everyone. I got nothing. Not that I expect it, but how can people dismiss thoughtful gestures like that? So many times I think that people only say "Thank you" because it's a HABIT. Not because they TRULY mean it. *sigh* I don't know? I am just so emotionally drained from today...maybe I am over reacting, but I tend to keep things like this inside until the pot boils over.

OK...that's the end of my rant. I am done for now. But like I said--home computer is up and running and I should be able to BITCH ON from now on....

You LUCKY LUCKY readers! :p